Good Morning Team AWESOME...day 12....oops 13... Nope 14, I just couldn't write yesterday or the day before… I'm struggling big time. I need some help and I don’t even know where to begin...
Again it is interesting that you guys know me so well, when I get quiet you know something is going on.
Well I am in a weird place health wise and not sure what I am to do. I think I need some advice, not that you guys know everything but I know there are so many of you that do have a lot of knowledge with health and nutrition, My body is giving me a real run for my money here and I starting to feel a little depression creeping in.. I try so hard to be positive and think on the good things but my body is betraying me and I am trying to work with it but it’s starting to piss me off... The whole control thing is becoming an issue and me not doing well with losing control especially over my body, the sleep thing is weighing big time on me, I getting maybe an hour or so a day and that doesn’t help with the weakness and blurry vision and the whole aura thing around my head, I have a horrible brain fog, my words are very slurry and having a hard time speaking, words are mixed up and that is very frustration, short term memory loss is not fun either. I feel stupid and yet I know I’m not, it’s just this head thing. One of the concerns with all the steroids that I am taking can make me diabetic, Brad has a kit so I’ve been checking my sugar which is usually 5 -6 which is perfect range but now my range is up to 12 and that is not good and I don’t want to add diabetic to my list of health concerns, so I am trying to drink green smoothies lots of kale cucumber celery lean protein and drink lots of water and greens. I am very week my left side is giving me a lot of grief my hand is doing weird things shaking and curling but I’m so weak on the left. I had to ask Brad to get a wheel chair for me and we were blessed that the red cross has lent us one for our whole visit, I’m hoping in a week or so I won’t need it but I’m thankful that I have it and I’m going to use it. Boy this is a hard on for me, but I just can’t do a very long walk; I am very off balance and shaky so why would I do this to myself, good bye pride I need help. I came out in the kitchen last night and leaned down to get something out of the fridge and I couldn’t get up I had no strength to get up. I fell on the floor and I sat there, it took me about 10 minutes for me to get to my hands and knees to be able to get to a chair and tried to get off the floor. 
I mean I know that this was going to be rough but I guess I wasn’t really expecting how rough it was going to be. I am trying to doing 1 thing a day and rest in between. I am giving me B 12 shots with other vitamins. If anyone can help me so a few other things to maybe get me built up I would appreciate some advice. I did get some diabetic boost to help that way and I have some much green stuff for juicing, I guess I will just stay away from adding fruit to it thought and stick just to veggies...
This week there has been so many little blessings from God for me and I dare say that I am ashamed of complaining about all the health struggles. I had applied for a program called “Look Good Feel Good “in Ontario in preparation of losing my hair and they teach you make-up ideas for the pigment changes and all the other skin changes through the radiation etc.. Well I was accepted before I left but I cancelled as I just didn't feel like I needed yet I wasn't ready, So when I got here I thought I would ask Amy Dole to see if I could hook up with the cancer centre here in Charlottetown. So we got connected and it worked out well, I the course was yesterday afternoon and it was full, but at the last moment there was a cancellation and I was in. So I went and participated the best I could. I was weepy and there was a young girl that helped me apply my make-up and encourage me every step of the way. So I left with some beautiful new make-up and a little self-esteem. I have an appointment with a woman that does the head henna. I think it could be fun so I go on Wed to get that down. I am meeting Chef Michael’s at is place on Thursday for lunch and to test some of his recipes that are going it to his next cookbook he is working on. That will be exciting. so this is my week so far. please pray fr my health issues. I have been able to get down two 2 steroids so i hope the sleep thing will start to alleviate, but I NEED SOME PRAYER, HELP MY SPIRITS TO STAY UP AND HELP ME ENJOY THE NEXT COUPLE DAYS..
THANK GUYS I NEED YOU!