Good Morning Team Awesome
So a few things this morning I wanted to share.
Life is so ironic and again, I have stated to please live each day as it is your last. This is a perfect example as to why. I know so many people have been affected in our community by the terrible passing of Tammy a week or so ago.
I knew Tammy and her husband Brad a little, more Brad than Tammy but recently spent some time with her as she was the person I worked with at the funeral home when I went to make arrangements for my passing… How ironic that I sat in her chair and made my arrangements with tears as I was the one diagnosed as terminal with little time left and yet her I was at her visitation. I was the one that was supposed to go not her. It was hard going to the funeral home as it brought so much back to me, it was the first funeral since I was diagnosed and I think quiet a natural time to think about your own funeral. I didn't stay around to long, long enough to have a hug with Brad and some words and then left. Tammy had also put an offer in on buying my store…. Life is ironic and not fair and hard. That is why we must take each day and enjoy it. This is a perfect example as to how quickly life changes in a blink of an eye. I went with my mom as she knew both of them very well for many years. It was hard on her also but for different reasons.
After we were done she drove me home. I wanted to stop quickly at the grocery store while I was out… After getting a few things, I was leaving and bumped into a guy I hadn't see in years. Again ironically he said to me “Hope you still alive I thought you were dead!” My mom quickly left, tears in her eyes and went to the car, I on the other hand thought it was kind of funny (yes I do have a weird sense of humour) obviously this poor guy had not heard of my situation and when I told him why my mom reacted so quickly and of my diagnoses he felt small. I know he didn't mean it in a cruel way he just hadn't seen me in years and picked the wrong phrasing to express it….lol that’s life remove foot from mouth sock is getting wet… lol
Also something else I found kind of humourous, again not to my poor mom… my mom went into a restaurant in Town the next day and a woman came up to her and started rubbing her arm and in a very compassionate voice said to her I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. She went on and on and mom quietly said “my daughter is still with us”… This poor lady thought I was the one who had passed away as most of you know or I think you know that my real name is Tammy not Hope, I changed my name about 18 years ago when I moved here..So this poor woman was confused…
So finally the news everyone is waiting for….. Drum roll please………
I went to the Cancer Center yesterday to see my wonderful Doctor. It is always an apprehensive day, fear of the unknown what are we going to learn today, will it be good news or bad news? It’s like when I wake up to get ready to go, I take a deep breathe in and begin holding it and it is not until we leave the center does my breathe release in slow steady stream usually till we are almost home… You go and sit in this large waiting room filled with approximately 50 people waiting for their name to be called. You take a look around and see faces that are scared, hopeful, happy, and ones that are not very healthy. No matter where you are on this cancer journey there is always someone worse off then you. I look at some of these people and say silent prayers for them and notes of praise and thankfulness that it is not me.
Yesterday, I went in with a lot of questions about all my side effects and how they are constantly getting worse. I shared about my eyes, and my swelling in my legs and feet and all the issues with my GI system, as I am sharing I felt somewhat ungrateful bringing up all these things when I feel in a way I should just shut up and be thankful I am alive. This little pill has given another chance at life and I should just take all the bad things with it, then I think but what of the quality of life??? Any way my wonderful Doctor came in and I shared my concerns with him…he heard me and my frustrations and said I understand what your saying, I can hear it in your voice and I see it in your eyes. What wonderful comforting words “I understand” and he did. He has decided that I should cut the dosage of my pill to half and see if I get the relief of side effects. I am a little hesitant about accepting this idea as right away I wondered will this make my cancer start to grow again should I shut up and deal with what I need to deal with... but as my concerns where racing through my thoughts he had some wonderful news for me…On Friday just 3 days ago a new drug was approved for my type of rare cancer. So, now when this drug fails, I will be able to go on this new drug and they are having wonderful results with it especially with people who have been on the pill I am currently taking. I was pretty amazed at his statement… To think I have this rare form of lung cancer with the ALK gene that only 3% of people have. So for every 47 woman who will develop lung cancer that 1.41 will develop the type of cancer I have and yet since August there has been 2 major breakthroughs. If you think that money donated to the cancer society is a waste of time and effort look into my eyes see my tears and see the gratefulness in my face for the people who continue to donate to the Cancer Society, they are the leaders in research and breakthroughs. I wanted to share a few facts about lung cancer that every time I read them they just blow me away….
Lung cancer is Canada’s top cancer killer — by far. It will kill more than 21,000 of us in 2013 — more than twice as many Canadians as any other cancer.
Women are paying a particularly fierce price. While lung cancer diagnoses for men have been trending down over the last three decades, diagnoses for women have been rising. Lung cancer will kill nearly 10,000 women this year — more than the total number of deaths among women from breast, uterine and ovarian cancers combined.
Then there is this fact — up to 15 per cent of lung cancer diagnoses in Canada are in people who never smoked. Indeed, lung cancer in non-smokers is the eighth largest cancer killer in Canada. For reasons that are not yet clear, the vast majority of never-smokers diagnosed with lung cancer are women.
Despite all these facts it is one of the least recognized cancers and has a very low fund raising success due to the stigmatisms associated with smoking.
Inadequate funding remains a major issue. While lung cancer accounts for more than a quarter of Canadian cancer deaths, the disease receives a pitiful 7 per cent of cancer-specific government research funding and — even worse — less than one per cent of private cancer donations.
Is this not sad…..it is to me and I have felt the prejudice against the type of cancer I have and that is not fair.
So maybe this is a good time to mention once again about the relay for life. I have 13 people who wanted to join our team and raise money for life saving cancer research. I am asking you, all my friends to look deep into your heart and pockets and to donate to a very very worth while cause. I am alive right now because of someone last year or the year before decided to donate to this life saving research and has made it possible for me to live. I now have an even longer life expectancy because of this brand new drug 3 days old that will be my next life line….Any amount will help so please consider this an opportunity to help another person and their family deal with this terrible disease. It is easy to donate on line. I will put the link up again you are able to pay through your credit card or your pay pal account, so if you are not in the area there is no excuse…lol If you do not wish to donate on line I am will to come pick up your donation. Please help me and my Team Awesome raise much needed funds…
Have a wonderful day and I guess the moral for this day is think twice before speaking to someone you haven’t seen in a while, and to live the life God gave us in a full and wonderful way, not taking for granted each breathe we take and each moment with a loved one….
Please consider joining me in the relay for life and if your not able participate please give to the cancer society…I will post the link that will take you directly to the donation page…
Thank you again. I think your prayers have created wonderful miracles on my behalf… so thank you again for opportunity to live longer…(yup your stuck with me for a lot longer)
All my Love Hope
So a few things this morning I wanted to share.
Life is so ironic and again, I have stated to please live each day as it is your last. This is a perfect example as to why. I know so many people have been affected in our community by the terrible passing of Tammy a week or so ago.
I knew Tammy and her husband Brad a little, more Brad than Tammy but recently spent some time with her as she was the person I worked with at the funeral home when I went to make arrangements for my passing… How ironic that I sat in her chair and made my arrangements with tears as I was the one diagnosed as terminal with little time left and yet her I was at her visitation. I was the one that was supposed to go not her. It was hard going to the funeral home as it brought so much back to me, it was the first funeral since I was diagnosed and I think quiet a natural time to think about your own funeral. I didn't stay around to long, long enough to have a hug with Brad and some words and then left. Tammy had also put an offer in on buying my store…. Life is ironic and not fair and hard. That is why we must take each day and enjoy it. This is a perfect example as to how quickly life changes in a blink of an eye. I went with my mom as she knew both of them very well for many years. It was hard on her also but for different reasons.
After we were done she drove me home. I wanted to stop quickly at the grocery store while I was out… After getting a few things, I was leaving and bumped into a guy I hadn't see in years. Again ironically he said to me “Hope you still alive I thought you were dead!” My mom quickly left, tears in her eyes and went to the car, I on the other hand thought it was kind of funny (yes I do have a weird sense of humour) obviously this poor guy had not heard of my situation and when I told him why my mom reacted so quickly and of my diagnoses he felt small. I know he didn't mean it in a cruel way he just hadn't seen me in years and picked the wrong phrasing to express it….lol that’s life remove foot from mouth sock is getting wet… lol
Also something else I found kind of humourous, again not to my poor mom… my mom went into a restaurant in Town the next day and a woman came up to her and started rubbing her arm and in a very compassionate voice said to her I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. She went on and on and mom quietly said “my daughter is still with us”… This poor lady thought I was the one who had passed away as most of you know or I think you know that my real name is Tammy not Hope, I changed my name about 18 years ago when I moved here..So this poor woman was confused…
So finally the news everyone is waiting for….. Drum roll please………
I went to the Cancer Center yesterday to see my wonderful Doctor. It is always an apprehensive day, fear of the unknown what are we going to learn today, will it be good news or bad news? It’s like when I wake up to get ready to go, I take a deep breathe in and begin holding it and it is not until we leave the center does my breathe release in slow steady stream usually till we are almost home… You go and sit in this large waiting room filled with approximately 50 people waiting for their name to be called. You take a look around and see faces that are scared, hopeful, happy, and ones that are not very healthy. No matter where you are on this cancer journey there is always someone worse off then you. I look at some of these people and say silent prayers for them and notes of praise and thankfulness that it is not me.
Yesterday, I went in with a lot of questions about all my side effects and how they are constantly getting worse. I shared about my eyes, and my swelling in my legs and feet and all the issues with my GI system, as I am sharing I felt somewhat ungrateful bringing up all these things when I feel in a way I should just shut up and be thankful I am alive. This little pill has given another chance at life and I should just take all the bad things with it, then I think but what of the quality of life??? Any way my wonderful Doctor came in and I shared my concerns with him…he heard me and my frustrations and said I understand what your saying, I can hear it in your voice and I see it in your eyes. What wonderful comforting words “I understand” and he did. He has decided that I should cut the dosage of my pill to half and see if I get the relief of side effects. I am a little hesitant about accepting this idea as right away I wondered will this make my cancer start to grow again should I shut up and deal with what I need to deal with... but as my concerns where racing through my thoughts he had some wonderful news for me…On Friday just 3 days ago a new drug was approved for my type of rare cancer. So, now when this drug fails, I will be able to go on this new drug and they are having wonderful results with it especially with people who have been on the pill I am currently taking. I was pretty amazed at his statement… To think I have this rare form of lung cancer with the ALK gene that only 3% of people have. So for every 47 woman who will develop lung cancer that 1.41 will develop the type of cancer I have and yet since August there has been 2 major breakthroughs. If you think that money donated to the cancer society is a waste of time and effort look into my eyes see my tears and see the gratefulness in my face for the people who continue to donate to the Cancer Society, they are the leaders in research and breakthroughs. I wanted to share a few facts about lung cancer that every time I read them they just blow me away….
Lung cancer is Canada’s top cancer killer — by far. It will kill more than 21,000 of us in 2013 — more than twice as many Canadians as any other cancer.
Women are paying a particularly fierce price. While lung cancer diagnoses for men have been trending down over the last three decades, diagnoses for women have been rising. Lung cancer will kill nearly 10,000 women this year — more than the total number of deaths among women from breast, uterine and ovarian cancers combined.
Then there is this fact — up to 15 per cent of lung cancer diagnoses in Canada are in people who never smoked. Indeed, lung cancer in non-smokers is the eighth largest cancer killer in Canada. For reasons that are not yet clear, the vast majority of never-smokers diagnosed with lung cancer are women.
Despite all these facts it is one of the least recognized cancers and has a very low fund raising success due to the stigmatisms associated with smoking.
Inadequate funding remains a major issue. While lung cancer accounts for more than a quarter of Canadian cancer deaths, the disease receives a pitiful 7 per cent of cancer-specific government research funding and — even worse — less than one per cent of private cancer donations.
Is this not sad…..it is to me and I have felt the prejudice against the type of cancer I have and that is not fair.
So maybe this is a good time to mention once again about the relay for life. I have 13 people who wanted to join our team and raise money for life saving cancer research. I am asking you, all my friends to look deep into your heart and pockets and to donate to a very very worth while cause. I am alive right now because of someone last year or the year before decided to donate to this life saving research and has made it possible for me to live. I now have an even longer life expectancy because of this brand new drug 3 days old that will be my next life line….Any amount will help so please consider this an opportunity to help another person and their family deal with this terrible disease. It is easy to donate on line. I will put the link up again you are able to pay through your credit card or your pay pal account, so if you are not in the area there is no excuse…lol If you do not wish to donate on line I am will to come pick up your donation. Please help me and my Team Awesome raise much needed funds…
Have a wonderful day and I guess the moral for this day is think twice before speaking to someone you haven’t seen in a while, and to live the life God gave us in a full and wonderful way, not taking for granted each breathe we take and each moment with a loved one….
Please consider joining me in the relay for life and if your not able participate please give to the cancer society…I will post the link that will take you directly to the donation page…
Thank you again. I think your prayers have created wonderful miracles on my behalf… so thank you again for opportunity to live longer…(yup your stuck with me for a lot longer)
All my Love Hope
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